Companionship is something we were built for; it’s a part of human nature. The longing to lock arms and exchange sweet smiles is not to be ignored. Finding love is important and we should keep ourselves open to possibilities.
However, we should not be so inviting that we appear desperate. Standards and politesse need always apply. No man wants a woman who is desperate. It is most attractive to seem desirable and confident. So, assume the correct position when hunting for men. When and with whom it is meant to be will happen. The key is remaining open and opportunistic. Here are a few tips for looking open to love without coming off as desperate:
Don’t seem too excited. Act like you’re used to getting attention. Men like women on the most wanted lists of other men. Whether you like it or not, you’re something like a trophy to them.
Don’t be too clingy. Call, text and/or e-mail enough that he knows you’re interested but not too much. You want to create a presence without applying too much pressure. A text here and there is fine. Leave it up to him, especially in the beginning, initiate regular communication.
Keep him on his toes. Don’t be too available. Reschedule a date once or twice. Don’t immediately respond to every text; periodically give it five to ten minutes. Act like you have a life even if you don’t have one.
Use your wit. Guys like a girl who can keep up. Being comfortable enough to have fun and show off your wit is a sign of confidence.
Pump the brakes on labels. Don’t push to update the Facebook relationship status to soon. Be secure in what you have to offer. Water the seeds for about three months and see if they grow. During that time, you don’t need any labels. He has to know taking you off of the market requires work.
Keep insecurities a secret. Be translucent not transparent. Let him in a little but don’t pour your heart out. He doesn’t need to know that you hate your nose and you’re still broken from past relationships. Keep the I-promise-I’m-not-a-crazy-girl sob stories to yourself.
Own your look. Be comfortable with who you are and don’t pretend to be something you’re not. Stepping outside of you to impress is definitely a sign of desperation. Give the guy a chance to fall in love with you.
Don’t over-analyze. Try not to dissect his every move. Let go and let it flow. When men are really interested they make the right moves, or at least make a fool of themselves trying which can be cute.
Have you ever had moments of desperation in your search for love?
